Why Not Me?
by Panny
Summary: “It’s just that when the Doctor met her… he was so different. All this time I thought there was something between us, but that it wouldn’t go anywhere because of him. Now I know it’s because of me.”


**Why Not Me?**

Mickey slowly stepped into Rose's TARDIS bedroom. He paused to look around a bit, taking in the rich décor. He'd only seen it briefly when she took him on his tour of the TARDIS an hour or so earlier and the stark contrast with her bedroom back home still caught him off guard. Everything was so mature, with matching furniture and muted colors. Amazing how much she'd changed. He looked over at her bed and found her curled up on her side atop the covers. Okay, maybe she hadn't changed that much.

"Are you okay?" He asked, approaching tentatively.

She rolled over to face him with a weak smile, tracks of eye liner and mascara running down her cheeks.

"Listen…" he began after a brief hesitation. "That whole thing about Sarah Jane and Cleopatra and everything… I shouldn't've said that. I know I can be a bit of a, well an arse really." He moved to sit on the bed beside her. "But it's only because I love you."

She sat up slightly and began to speak, but he cut her off. "Look, I know things are over between us. I wasn't trying to say anything like that. It's just… I really do care about you. And I'm worried about you."

She squeezed his hand and smiled. "Thanks."

"So, come on then." He gave her thigh a pat. "Stop moping about Little Miss Madame De Pompadour. I mean, I you're /I the one here, not her."

She sighed and sat up, hugging her knees to her chest. "Yeah, I know. And it's not like I have anything against her. She was actually really nice." She smiled wryly, but her face quickly soured. "It's just that when the Doctor met her… he was so different. All this time I thought there was something between us, but that it wouldn't go anywhere because of him. Now I know it's because of me."

"Rose…"

"It's true though. I thought he just didn't do stuff like that. Didn't do romance and dating and dancing and all that. Now I know the truth. He just wouldn't do it with me." She slid back down to lay on her side. "Time to give up. Maybe I should just go home…"

"Oh, no no. I'm not having that." Mickey stood up and pointed at her...pointedly. "I gave you up because of him. Because you and him… you have, well… something you and me never had. And I don't care, even if he did kiss her and-"

"He I kissed /I her?!" Rose bolted upright, then fell onto her back with a thud, moaning. "It really is over…"

Mickey swallowed hard. "I thought you knew… he sort of mentioned it when he was setting up the audio link. Guess you were with her then… anyway, doesn't matter. Really it doesn't. You can't just give up and go home."

"Why not?" She was staring up at the ceiling wistfully.

"Because, you weren't in love with him when you first left with him. And don't you look at me like that - you love him and you know it. Don't know how he doesn't. Anyway, you went with him to see what's out there. You just got back from a 51st Century space ship I and /I you got to see Versailles. How many people can say that?"

She smiled weakly. "Yeah, I guess so."

"And who cares if the Doctor's moping around. We're in an awesome time machine, and we can go wherever we want! May not be much, but you got me. We used to have fun, yeah?" He gave her a nudge, watching her smile grow. "So come on, what do you say we find him and go some place cool. Always wanted to visit the U.S."

She looked thoughtful for a moment. "Well, I've been to Utah, but I think that's it…"

"What's in Utah?"

She shuddered slightly. "Nothing much really. An egomaniac who thought he owned the internet, some alien artifacts and a totally selfish wanker." She sighed. "All went down hill after I brought Adam on board… causing that wound in time didn't exactly help either."

Mickey rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. I thought I said to quit feelin' sorry for yourself. I'd at least like to get a chance to accidentally destroy the world myself before you give up and run home."

She smacked him with a pillow, trying to hide her smile.

"Oi! Come on then, let's get the Doctor. We can go to New York City, or the pyramids of Egypt or whatever. And don't worry, things'll be back to normal before you know it."

Rose groaned. "But I don't want normal."

Mickey frowned. "Alright, look. I think I'm being like, the perfect ex-boyfriend, trying to help you out, but don't push it."

She rolled her eyes and sat up, finally climbing out of bed. "Right, right." Her shoulders sagged and she forced herself to stand up straight. "You're right. Sod the Doctor, you and I are going out. Fancy a concert?"

"Sounds great."

"Good. Doctor owes me a trip anyways. Ian Dury at the Top Rank, Sheffield, England, Earth, 1979. Hell of a year!" She gave Mickey a huge grin and took his hand, leading the way out and to the console room. He was right. She couldn't cry all day, and she wasn't going to run away. All she could do was push forward and take what the Doctor would give her, even if it would always be friendship. Reinette was right about the Doctor being worth the monsters, even if the ones she faced were jealousy, regret and heartbreak.


End file.
